After a slight bit of inspiration today, I decided that people need to hear my thoughts again. It might have something to do with posting a status that got 52 "likes" on FB. No really, I've been thinking about blogging again and even logged in to my blog account a couple of times. Most of my material last time was being mean about others. Either I was a moody pregnant woman or fear that my judgmental comments will result in Bryn's features resembling a troll or monkey has made me decide to be less hateful about people. Instead, I'll pick on myself.
I was scrolling through my newsfeed today and noticed nearly everyone was married. Even two "unfortunate" looking people. In my disbelief, I sent my best friend a text "they're married.... and I'm single". To which she replied, "they're not picky". Be that as it may, I have standards. Then I thought it over and decided.... she's right. Below you will find a list of reasons why I have chosen to discontinue potential relationships with otherwise really great guys:
- His lips were too thin.
- He was too short.
- His hairline was receding.
- He was too emotional.
- He had back hair.
- His breath was bad. (Admit it, this is always a deal breaker. Don't judge me.)
- His hand grazed my tata.
- There was a "friend" in his nose.
- I didn't like his phone voice.
What have I learned from these experiences? To buy Claritin and about 29 cats because I'm never going to find someone that I won't pick apart. If I don't find anything wrong with him, it's because I'm dreaming.